Alright... no hicups!

No hiccups for me!!! Yaha!
I still don't have an appointment for the MRI.
I don't care...

Really what will they tell me... I got half a brain. Whoopppeee!

Okay it is time to do some youtube...

David Bowie - Let's Dance


David Bowie- Starman


David Bowie- Space Oddity
That last video was from 1969!!! Oh my god... I'm getting old!


David Bowie - Ziggy Stardust

so old... so so old....




I could go in but I wont... It was for a friend... who is lost... I hope to see you... I hope you are well...

nobody loves me...and Sai Baba

I can look at the traffic that comes here... and compare it to traffic from a month to a year ago... and what i see makes me frown... a lot!
I have very few "friends".

oh well... there loss... ???

have a little youtube... my friends.


What!!!


now lets see what he talks about.


interesting...

I wish he was God... i really do... but alas he is a poor man.

Here ya go... again No Avm's to report...

but this article is about them.

from....

What are you laughing at?

Recently I've been thinking about how people manage to get out of bed in the morning, much less function, much less laugh, when their life is turned upside down.

One of the many bad things that can happen to a brain is the rupture of an AVM. AVMs are nasty business -- it stands for arterio-venous malformation, which basically means a tangle of blood vessels in the brain that are naturally structurally weaker because they are a tangle vs. the nice smooth highways that our brains are supposed to contain. They give out sometimes and dump blood into places in the brain where blood is most definitely not supposed to be, and there's not much room in there for extra, so the rest of the brain can get sort of smooshed around. AVMs just are - we could all be walking around with them right now, versus a stroke that's caused by high blood pressure, diabetes, or the like which are easily measured and monitored. As an aside -- famous AVMs include those of Senator Tim Johnson and Nate Fisher, a character from the amazingly good show Six Feet Under.

I've met a lot of people with this problem and one particular guy comes to mind. He was living a typical, happy existence -- working hard at his job, spending time with his family, playing pick-up basketball with his boys on the weekend. He was, unfortunately, doing all of this with an AVM that ruptured and left him unable to make sounds on purpose, use one of his arms, walk, read, parent his child, send an email, go the bathroom on his own, follow a tv show, etc. etc. He's my age - in another life I can see being really good friends with him and his wife -- actually, that's not true, they are both way to cool for me. He got measurably better every day -- I knew what his favorite movie was and where he was born because he drew me pictures until I figured it out, he could call to his wife from another room, and ask his son if he needed to go potty. But he was a realist-- he knew he was in the proverbial hurt locker and it was going to be a long tough road out.

The amazing thing was you could hear him laugh all over the building. It sounded like a guy who just cracked a joke to his buddy while watching the big game at a local bar - it was loud, genuine, and absolutely devilish.

My boyfriend my senior year in high school was the oldest of three brothers. His father died of a heart attack in their home by the front door when he was very young, and his brothers even younger. Several years later, his middle brother was cleaning a hunting rifle in their house when it discharged, shooting and killing his youngest brother, who was no more than 10, in their home by the front door. His mother, a woman of tremendous faith and the picture of servant leadership, is still the single biggest influence on my own faith story even though I haven't seen her in more than 10 years, simply because she not only found a way to put shoes on every day and comb her hair, but a year or so after I'd seen her at her son's funeral, I passed her in the car and she was laughing. Out loud. Like something was really, really funny. I was amazed -- it just didn't occur to me that any moment wouldn't be filled with such grief that it was paralyzing.

I am prone to fits of giggles, mostly at inappropriate times (like this Sunday in church when one of the ushers bobbled just a bit when walking the offering plates up the aisle -- she didn't fall but just idea of it set me off). I hope that wherever that lives in my brain and my soul would survive whatever disasters may be in my future.

Make someone laugh today.

Here's the source for the picture: http://www.nowgasm.com/Maitreya_Laughing_Buddha.htm

--------

I think it is a great article.

AVM Brain....

from...
June 07, 2008
Chuck Erion

Jill Bolte Taylor was a 37-year-old brain scientist when she suffered a stroke in late 1996. As she narrates in "My Stroke of Insight" (Viking $27.50), she realized that her left brain was impaired: it took her 45 minutes to recall the phone number of a colleague (remembering 911 was impossible), and another half-hour to locate her doctor's number on a business card.

Her brain was being flooded with blood, the hemorrhage due to a rare AVM (arteriovenous malformation).

But, without the ego control of her left brain, her right brain took over her consciousness with a sense of "flow," of being one with the universe and lost in wordless wonder. Fortunately, her colleague surmised her brain trauma over the phone -- language skills were also lost, even though she could form words in her head -- and got her to a Boston hospital. Thus began her eight-year journey of recovery.

Taylor writes from a unique perspective about how the medical system should assist stroke and brain injury victims.

Her background as a neuroanatomist not only gave her special empathy for such victims, it meant that she could diagnose her own crisis and ramp up her determination to rebuild all the skills and knowledge (from spelling to walking) that the stroke had stolen from her.

Just a few months after surgery to remove the clot, Taylor was able to address a meeting of the National Association for Mental Illness, for whom she had been a spokesperson.

Her mother was instrumental in her recovery; she worked with Taylor full-time as she had as an infant to rediscover colours, shapes, letters and how to use a spoon.

Through the years of regaining her abilities, Jill struggled to hold on to that sense of well-being, that Nirvana, which her right brain had found, unfettered by her logical, language- and memory-based left brain.

While exploring emotions as if for the first time, she could shed the baggage they had previously been encumbered with.

"Have you ever noticed how these negative internal thought patterns have the tendency to generate increased levels of inner hostility and/or raised levels of anxiety?"

Taylor's mission is twofold.

To improve the compassion of family and caregivers towards stroke, brain injury and mentally ill patients, and to urge all of us to cultivate right-brain awareness.

The latter is the grateful realization that our trillions of cells vibrate with universal energy. She suggests meditation and mindfulness techniques, such as noticing your breathing, to cultivate insights which she was able to achieve thanks to her stroke.

The taxonomy of left and right brain functions adds a dimension that philosophers from ancient times to the 20th century lacked. The location of the seat of consciousness has long been debated but never reduced to mere neurons and cells.

For atheistic scientists like Richard Dawkins who claim that religion has outlived its usefulness, neuroanatomies begs the question of where in the brain does consciousness of self and of God exist.

Scientific materialism leaves no room for notions of God-mind, but as David Berlinski points out in "The Devil's Delusion - Atheism and its Scientific Pretension" (Crown $27.95) such a paradigm is wrong-headed (pun intended).

Science and religion are not rivals but rather different responses to the human condition. The search for meaning and purpose in life goes beyond what the ever-expanding circle of scientific facts can tell us. We still need "a story."

Isn't it interesting that a hard-nosed brain scientist, thanks to the baby-step relearning of life skills following her stroke, can point us to a mystical awareness that all our (right) brains share. I heartily recommend her book.

We're all blessed with chance to expand our minds, hopefully without the blowup of an arteriovenous malformation.

Chuck Erion is co-owner of Words Worth Books in Waterloo.

Ten Guidelines for Interacting with a Stroke Survivor

Ten Guidelines for Interacting with a Stroke Survivor



I. Treat me the same way as you did before my stroke – I am the same person.

II. Every stroke is different; therefore every stroke survivor is different. Common impairments for stroke survivors are: Vision, balance, speech, hearing, and paralyzed on one side.

III. Some stroke survivors have difficulty communicating verbally as well as reading, writing, spelling, and understanding what is being said, this is called aphasia.Our brains have been rewired which affects our communication. So, we need you to: Give us enough time to respond. Talk slowly; offer at times to repeat yourself. Be patient when trying to communicate with us. It is okay to help us find a word when we are having trouble.

IV. There are other ways of communication besides words. Gestures, Facial expressions, Body languages, Pictures, Pen & paper.

V. Treat us like adults and not children. Speak directly to us, not our spouse or friend. Don’t talk like the stroke survivor isn’t there. Laugh with us not at us.

VI. Give the stroke survivor a chance to be independent. Ask before you help them. Follow his/her instructions for initiating the help.

VII. Many stroke survivors have problems with balance. A rough pat on my back, shoulder, or arm can easily set us off balance and can hurt me. Be gentle and understand that it can take a lot of concentration to walk, especially on uneven surfaces.

VIII. Wheelchair and walker are extensions of us. Please respect our space. If you bump the chair, please say excuse me. Please don’t lean on a wheelchair.

IX. Talk to us at eye level when possible when we are in a wheel chair. You can also back up a few feet to make it easier for a person in a wheelchair to look at you.

X. When we are tired and/or frustrated, ALL of our basic skills (i.e. talking, walking, handwriting, and concentration) diminish. If we are more agitated than usual, we are probably tired or frustrated!

Have patience and encourage us to rest or “take a break” when appropriate.

©American Stroke Foundation 2006


i still suffer from aphasia...thank God for spell check!!!