Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Reviews of Movies that SUCK part one.

Review of Movies that suck! Part one…
Okay I love movies, I really do. I think that I would rather watch a good movie more than pee.. or eat.. or have sex.. well at least with my wife.. ya know how it is)
But more and more I see people reviewing movies that they liked.. why doesn’t anyone review movies that suck?
So here is my first official review of a movie that sucks!
Dungeons and Dragons.. Starring Jeremy Irons
Some 16 year old tart played by some no name bimbo (Thora Birch) inherits a kingdom, and thinks she has the wit to rule it, better than the clan of wizards that currently are running the joint.. some evil dude with other intentions and a side kick with bad eye makeup try to stop her… A couple of goofy street urchins, thieves with good hearts, (yuck) help her out in the end, and everyone lives happily ever after..
Okay, bad eye makeup on dudes should have been left to A Clockwork Orange and The Rocky Horror Picture Show IMHO.

The plot is predictable all the way through, from start to finish there is not one twist or little ditty to excite the mind. It was rated PG-13 and should have been G.. I can see a 5 year old getting excited about this .. but a six year old.. probably not..

I will admit, I played D&D I had a good time doing it.. we went on all sorts of adventures which broadened out imagination and to some small degree intellect. I think back now and any one of our home made, hand written campaigns would have made a better story. I can’t believe that Gary Gygax had anything at all to do with this. The wit and intelligence that really is that game, as Gary I believe had intended it, when played well is absent from this piece of dung entirely.

G.G. if you ever read this, I am sorry man.. The minds that are left at TSR should have their heads examined for ever loaning the D&D Name to a lump of tripe like this.
I mean Bugbear dung does not stink as much as this movie!
If you really want to waste some of your hard earned gold pieces just so you can own a copy and really fill that collection out, go ahead buy this waste or a DVD at amazon.. I dare ya! (click the icon below to read more reviews or to actually buy this CRAPPY movie)

No comments: