Wednesday, December 28, 2005

antidepressans have me depressed part II

Well after long contemplation and against dr's orders, I started takign the luvox again last night.. it may be partial psycological, but today I feel a lot better.. my skin is not as crawly and I dont; want to yell at people..
I still woudl like to get off all of this shit.. but fear the withdrawl.. perhpas at some time in the future, I wil be better suited to try getting off again.. like if I have no job, and am on a desert island alone with no sharp things..

There has to be an easier way to get off this crap.. but I do not think my Dr. knows what that is.. and I have too much at stake to risk an embarrasing explosion at a boss or co-worker.. especialy without good cause, and I tell you in the last week and a half that has been a very tempting proposal..

They say that this stuff is not addicting, I say that they are full of crap.. and have never tried to get off of one of their drugs after a few years of use.
I hate.. let me rephrase that .. FUCKING HATE! being addicted to anyting, and I blem the drug companes, and to a lesser degre the medical community for making it so easy to get hooked on this shit.

The way I see it, I should have never been put on any antidepressant in the first place, but if I was I should ahve been taken off of it as soon as things setteled down.. I feel like I was put on an addicting substance and then forgotten.. the medical community woudl never think of doing this with a opiate.. but feels no shame in doing it with an anti-depressant. That's just wrong.

Well today looks like it will be better than yesterday.. I ahve one and a half luvox on board, and am tired but not nutters.. I will now go to work and forget what I am doing.. fucking shit.

Should be too bust to breath today, so for now wish me well..

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