Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Duke Lacrosse Private Eye: Saint’s Blood. Part One: An Unusual Encounter.

(picture thanks to

I now offer to you, the second Duke Lacrosse Private Eye Story.. this one as the last should be filled with thrills , and chills and a bunch of kinky sex too..
and now without further delay.. I bring you...

Duke Lacrosse Private Eye: Saint’s Blood.
Part One: An Unusual Encounter.
It was a typical Thursday, well other than he fact that I was not hung-over, and did not have any intention of going to the strip bar down the street.
I was finishing up a little ditty for a dame who thought her husband was cheating. Turns out, he was, they always are, but it was with who that made it so damn entertaining.
He was sleeping with the staff of the local Circus side show.. Bearded lady, fat lady, rubber lady.. all of ‘em. The pictures I got from the parking lot of that sleazy hotel were worth a mint, to the wife and my friends in the fetish business. You would be amazed at the positions a rubber lady can get into .. (damn that looks like it hurts).

Wednesday had the day off, we.. she had taken the week off, seems she had a problem with working for rubber checks.. unlike the rubber lady the checks I had written Wednesday lately were not a good sort of fucking.. but after I got this little bit of business out of the way, we would be rollin’ in dough again. From time to time Wednesday would get up in a huff, when I could not pay her, but still managed to support my booze and stripper habits.. freakin women who can figure then out?

Well that would soon be over I thought, as I sealed the envelops to the wife, and my friend Nix (The porn King) Nix was the best thing that had happened to me lately, the royalty checks from the last story came regular, and I found I could upgrade form cheap scotch to inexpensive scotch with the extra money..

Hell, they even paid for the Gallon of KY and trip to Hedonism II I had promised Wednesday .. but that’s another story.

Like what happens in every cheesy private Dick story what happened next was as predictable as it was cliché’. A dame walked in.. a real stunner.

I hear her enter in through the front door, my office door, a frosted glass number stood between her and me, in the light of the front office, where Wednesday normally sat, I could see the profile of my visitor. She was petit thing, with curves that would make Lombardi street in San Fran jealous. I let her stand out there a while, I liked to see what someone would do in an empty office, if they did not know that they were being watched.. this dame was a class act, she was writing a note on Wednesday’s desk. After a moment she turned to leave, that’s when I cleared my throat to let her know I was in. (I was thinking about getting in and out and in and out with her.. them was some curves!)

“Mr. Lacrosse?” she called, through he glass.. She had a satin smooth voice, with a hint of an Eastern European accent. “I am looking for a Mr. Lacrosse.”

“You found him doll, come on it.” I said back to the glass not bothering to get up and open the door.
From my desk, I had a good view of those entering, and the lamp in the front office was positions so that in the case of a sheer dress walking in, I could get a good shot of the silhouette of what was under.. you gotta love back lighting!

She came in and my breath left.. wow, what a stunner.. thick dark hair, with the kind of curls you could really wrap your fingers around and long enough to tie to the bed post, dark eyes, so deep that you just wanted to dive in.. and lips the reddest I had ever seen, so full and so soft looking you just wanted to have them wrap around your… (oh sorry…what was I saying??)

He voice was that of an angel.. Hypnotizing.. she talked.. I tried to listen but I was enthralled by her mouth too much to concentrate on the words.. I just kept seeing flashes of that bubble gum tongue, (I smell sex and candy kept running through my mind.. gaddamn adult ADD!) and those whiter than white teeth.. “”All the better to suck you with”.. I thought (wished ) I heard her say.

She went on for a few minutes, I stood staring, feeling a stiffening in my drawers that I hoped she would not see.. well not yet anyway.. in and amongst all my naughty thoughts, I got the impression that she was wanting to hire me.. hire me for a job, that had nothing to do with Tammy NYP, the porn industry, or getting shot at.. too bad I enjoy two outta three of those..
I asked her to sit in the chair directly across from me.. she wore a smart gray business suit, with a short skirt, no blouse! and smart shoes with an all too sharp looking heel.. “damn nice.” I kept thinking. Her neckline dropped just low enough to reveal an occasional flash of red satin bra.. my mind immediately put the matching panties on her..

“I’m not wearing any”.. she said across the desk to me..
I thought I had imagined it.. but after a moment I noticed that she was not talking any more.. that she was staring at me.. cool and calm.. “I’m sorry?!?!” I said.

“I’m not wearing any.” She said as deliberately as I have ever heard anything said to anybody..
“Jeez Duke, you let that slip?? ‘ I thought to myself..

“No but you are an easy man to read. All men are easy to read once you know them , or know of them.” Again she said this so coolly I thought I felt a shiver.

“That’s some cute trick you go there.” I said grinning at her.. trying not to let it show that I was really creeped out, by this whole mind reading business..

“No trick, but rather the result of years of watching men.” Her grin opened and those whiter than white teeth flashed, a glint of mischief in her eye, she knew she was toying with me like a cat on a mouse and she was enjoying it.

This dame can’t be but 23 or 24 I thought, how could she have spent years doing anything. Hell I got underwear older than this girl.. I was starting to re-gather my composure at the realization that while she may have been beautiful and she may have been able to startle me but she was still a kid, a damn beautiful one but still a kid. As for her mind reading trick, I had seen “cold reads” like this a hundred time in the clubs. But this was the first time I was sober, and the schmuck doing the cold read didn’t look like John Edwards. This was no schmuck. And I doubt that John Edwards has anyone in his gene pool with looks like this babe.

“Mr. Lacrosse, seriously for a moment if I may, I am in need of your services, I need you to help me find an item.” She said tossing a photo onto my desk.

“What’s that , some kind’a Church art?” I said looking down at a picture of what looked like a jewel encrusted orb on a stick, something you would only see on a Saint’s day at a Catholic church.
(photo borrowd from
“In a sense it is just that. It is the reliquary of the Blood of St. Cecelia” she tailed off, as if remembering something.. as she said it..

“And it’s worth something?” I said..

“It is priceless…..” she nearly whispered…her eyes were looking someplace far away, or long ago.. now it was her turn to be mesmerized.

“And what’s in this for me..” I said taking back my normal composure.

“All you ever imagined” she said, leaning forward so as to expose a bit of her cleavage and another good glimpse of that red bra..

My mouth fell open.. I know I wanted to say something.. but for fucks sake, I couldn’t think of what?

Needless to say I took the job. She said she would be back the following evening to discuss some details, of the case, I asked if I could meet her for dinner.. hell Wednesday was pissed off at me, why not? My client refused, and acted a little shy for the first time since she had walked in.. this was going to be interesting.. very interesting.

(to be continued)
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1 comment:

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